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Someone up there hates me….

I went to the hospital this morning for surgery. The doctor want to operate a small tube into my chest, for them to stick all their needles for the chemo. So I arrived at 7.15 in the morning, my Mum at my side…..after waiting 45 minutes a nurse told me that the doctors had cancelled the operation last Monday, they just forgot to tell me.
Then I waited two more hours for a doctor to arrive and tell me, that they had talked about me on a conference last Monday, cause my wounds does not heal…As it is now I have tree holes in the wound! Basically what they told me was, that if I do not heal before 21. Of December, they have to operate me again…this time taking my entire breast…They explained it to me. Telling me that chemo had to start within four month after an operation to be any good, and I had my operation in August, so I am in a critical state right now.
So right now I just feel totally blank……..My mum and grandmother is crying, my dad is yelling and I just sit here feeling completely empty……I have to start at the nurse again tree times a week, and I just hope I heal up within the next two weeks…But it don`t look good…………..

And I just want to tell all of you how much your support means to me.
♥I love you♥


( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 7th, 2007 06:11 pm (UTC)
i love you.
and i just.
i dont know what to say.
i wish i could give you strength and i wish things just worked out for you.
you'll be in my prayers darling. <3
Dec. 7th, 2007 06:21 pm (UTC)
Thanks hon,
you really don`t have to say anything, just knowing you`re here for me, means more than I can tell you;)
Dec. 7th, 2007 08:35 pm (UTC)
I'm so sorry to hear that -________-
I so hope everything will be alright for you Kastanje Honey.
I don't understand why they didn't talk about it with you sooner -_-
But you have to keep courage!
Dec. 8th, 2007 02:41 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much sweetie;..
Apparently they "forgot" to tell about their decision, so I got a bit of a chock when they told me...
I try to keep courage, it`s just really hard right now..
Dec. 9th, 2007 03:41 pm (UTC)
Let us know when you learn more...
Dec. 9th, 2007 06:20 pm (UTC)
Thanks sweetie, I will..
Dec. 8th, 2007 12:22 am (UTC)
I wish I could reach out and just hug you right now. I'm so sorry hon!
Dec. 8th, 2007 02:41 pm (UTC)
Thanks hon,
I feel the hug all they way over here♥
Dec. 8th, 2007 12:46 am (UTC)
Aww! I'm so so sorry to hear that, you deserve so much better darling. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Please don't give up hope miracles still happen.

Even if you have to have your breast removed there is all sorts of things can be done. My RL best friends sister had breast cancer and then had reconstruction surgery after her's was removed and that was nearly 10 years ago and she made a full recovery and is fit & healthy.

Another friend had lots of problems like you and she is fit & healthy still after 5 years. So please don't give up hope.

Sending lots of love and hugs and kisses to you.
Dec. 8th, 2007 02:45 pm (UTC)
Thanks honey,
I guess you get rather narrowminded when something like this happens; I know I do....
So it is good to hear that other people get through something like this...
Thanks for everything;) Take care♥
*hugs and kisses*
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )

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