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AM I REALLY SUCH A BAD FRIEND????

I don’t think myself, but I think some of you think so…getting angry at me and defriending me…

I´m not much on defending myself but I think I have to, because this really really makes me sad and down and I can’t handle that right now….

I think I do my best to comment on all your posts; I vote at all the polls and make comments on all the memes.
I make birthday posts, and send emails and snail mail to you….send v-gifts when I can….
I have 11 pages with name and addresses with Christmas presents I’ve bought for you and I’ve made Christmas cards for you too.
I think I do what I can on LJ…

Brings me to Rl…

I´m cancer free and YAY..unfortunately that doesn’t mean that I´m anywhere close to being well.
I have side effects raining down on my head, making more and more an invalid, that really soon needs to move to another apartment as I can’t do the stairs anymore…
I have rehab over my head, I know it is only two hours a day, but with the pain I´m going through now, it seems like the end of my life sometimes, and I have to cancel…
My Mum, which is the most important person in my life beside Sarah…has started grieving the loss of my Dad…the loss of the life they should have together…the fact that she have to move yet another time as she can’t afford the apartment she has now.
She hardly eats now, I call her several times a day, tries to be with her every day, as she eats when I´m there…..
She worries about me too, making everything worse for her…

So it is not that I´m sitting here, ignoring you guys..I love you so much and I know I wouldn’t be here if not for you……so please bear with me if I miss a post once in a while….

Comments

( 99 comments — Leave a comment )
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paloma1182
Nov. 4th, 2010 04:46 pm (UTC)
noooo dont be upset please! i have the same problem lately! there are so many people de-friending me and honestly i cant let it bother me i have the people that i love and want in my life and thats all that matters!

u are the most giving, caring, loving, adorable woman i have ever met- and if they dont want to be friends with you then believe me it is THIER loss! please dont let something like this get you down.. really...

if they made more of an effort with you im sure that you would talk to them more as well! so its not always all on you pips my love.

I LOVE YOU SOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:02 pm (UTC)
Thank you my Baby-doll♥ Thank you for always being here for me and looking after me♥
I don´t know, maybe I just feel sorry for myself now, and then everything annoys me....
I´m so happy that I have you♥
Love you so very much♥
Hugs and kisses
(no subject) - paloma1182 - Nov. 4th, 2010 05:05 pm (UTC) - Expand
aelia1980
Nov. 4th, 2010 04:54 pm (UTC)
Oh honey, don´t be sad about your "friends" here on LJ. I think if they deleted you without giving you a real reason they weren´t real friends anyways. I think you´re kind and sweet to everyone and do a lot things that not everyone does - me included (like v-gifts or Christmas presents and stuff) - and you´re really awesome. And I think no one should expect that much from a friend here on LJ. I mean, I don´t expect all my friends to comment on every one of my fanfiction (which they don´t) or even read them so don´t you think that something like this is expected from you. Sometimes, there is just nothing to say ;).
I´m really sorry that you´re hurting so much because of that but you just shouldn´t take it too personal, as long as it wasn´t friends you were really in touch to via messages.

About your health, it´s really horrible news. You´re cancer free, which is wonderful, but still so sick, it makes me sad, it really does. It must be horrible hurting all the time... So all I can wish for you is palliation and recovery.

The news about your mom are also not good but really, I think you´re so great, worrying about her while you are feeling so sick yourself. You´re really extraordinary, not everyone would do that!

Sending you a big hug!
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:06 pm (UTC)
Thanks sweetheart, I´m glad that I have you here..
I don´t expect people to comment on all my entries either, so if I miss and entry once in a while it shouldn´t be that bad...

Thank you for all your good wishes on me and my Mum...I really worries about her..funny as I used to work as a care helper with people with much more serious problems..and I could help them but not my Mum...but I love her and I will do anything for her..
Thank you sweetheart♥
Hugs and kisses
death_box
Nov. 4th, 2010 04:54 pm (UTC)
I absolutely do not think you're a bad friend! <3

While I don't know exactly how hard it is to experience everything you're going through, I know that it's gotta be tough, and RL stuff always comes first. *hugs*
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:12 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much honey..yes Rl can be a bitch sometimes..
♥hugs♥
(Deleted comment)
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:13 pm (UTC)
Hey sweetheart♥ I´ve missed you too, glad that you´re back♥
Love you♥
kasiopeia
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:06 pm (UTC)
You are a great friend! You shouldn't let people defriending you get to you. If they defriended you, they probably wasn't people you'd like as friends anyway. It isn't expected that everyone comments on everything all the time, and you have more than most going on in your life.

*Huggles*
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:14 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much honey for your kind words...you should know about me being absent.....

Knuser og klemmer♥


(no subject) - kasiopeia - Nov. 4th, 2010 05:39 pm (UTC) - Expand
anastdean
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:07 pm (UTC)
You're a great friend sweetie and please hung in there okay? Wishing you all the best. Lots of hugs your way.
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:15 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much darling♥ I´m so glad that I have you..♥
Huggles and kisses
silkmoth101
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:18 pm (UTC)
Oh dear Lord! Don't you ever think you're a bad friend, sweetie! You're the most gentle soul I ever met. *hugs you tight*

Um... have you ever thought about moving in with your mother, or search for an appartment you can both live in? I'm just asking because if you both have to move... but I'm not sure if you want that or if your mom wants that... was just a thought.

pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:18 pm (UTC)
Thanks honey thanks for your kind words.
We´ve talked about that we´ll be moving in together if I get so bad that I can´t be alone..but apart from that no...maybe I should bring it up..
♥love you honey♥
saurina
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:26 pm (UTC)
Hej Pippii

Jeg synes heller ikke at det er særligt fedt når nogen tager mig af deres venneliste. Men ofte så er det personer som jeg ikke har snakket med længe.
Jeg har selv nogle personer på min liste som jeg har overvejet at slette, da jeg aldrig har snakket med dem ud over da jeg første gang satte dem på listen. Jeg har dog endnu ikke gjort alvor af det og ved heller ikke om jeg gør det, men det jeg mener er, at jeg sådan set godt kan forstå hvorfor nogen gør det. MEN der findes desværre også dem som af en eller anden grund har set sig sur på en fordi man har sagt eller gjort noget de ikke kunne lide, og jeg har altså svært meget svært ved at se dig som en af de personer. Du virker utrolig sød og bekymre dig om dine venner, så hvis det er pga noget du har gjort at de har taget dig af listen, så er du bare nød til at tage mit ord for, at det nok mere har noget med dem at gøre end dig. Som du kan se er jeg ikke den eneste her på siden som mener det.

Så op med humøret der findes heldigvis en masse andre vidunderlige mennesker herinde som for alt i verden ikke ville miste dit venskab, jeg tilhører en af dem, og ja jeg kommenterer ikke på alle poster og skriver heller ikke så mange selv, som jeg kunne ønske. Men jeg forsøger at nå så meget som muligt på den tid jeg har til rådighed efter at den virkelige verden har gjort sit indtog, og andet kan man heller ikke forlange af dig søde.

Så lov mig at du ikke tager det alt for nært med de mistede venner, for når det kommer til stykket så var de nok ikke det værd alligevel ellers ville de stadig være her, har jeg ret?

Kæmpe knus fra mig til dig..:)
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:22 pm (UTC)
Hej søde..

Jeg har også nogle på min liste som jeg aldrig hører fra, men jeg har ikke slettet dem..
Problemet lige nu er at der er en der ikke synes jeg støtter hende nok, og en som jeg er på gave med der har slettet mig...så bliver jeg lidt urolig..
Jeg har en vidunderlig flist, folk der har været her siden før jeg blev syg og stadig er her, og nye der bare er så fantastiske..det er jeg glad for.

Kan jeg få dig til at PM mig dit navn og adresse så du kan komme på min juleliste?

♥krammer♥
(no subject) - saurina - Nov. 4th, 2010 06:50 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pippii - Nov. 4th, 2010 06:56 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - saurina - Nov. 4th, 2010 07:07 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pippii - Nov. 4th, 2010 07:20 pm (UTC) - Expand
theshi
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:32 pm (UTC)
Darling, don't you worry. Even if I myself haven't been a good friend lately, not talking to ANYONE (which is no one's fault but mine), whoever defriends you don't know what they're missing. You're an adorable and awesome and so amazingly kind woman... I'd probably cry if I had to miss your birthday wishes nearly every day. Not because I would miss cute sparkling pictures, but because I've never met someone who spends her free time so genuinely caring about the people she knows. If that isn't the definition of a good friend, I don't know what is.

Honestly, you are wonderful. Do not let anyone make you think otherwise. *very, very big hugs*

Also, I plan to get in contact as soon as I've sorted my life out because I really, really miss you and all the amazing people over the net :( I'm really sorry for having been absent so long.
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:33 pm (UTC)
Ohhh sweetheart, thank you so so much for your kind and lovely words...
♥hugs and love you♥
Ohh if I can do anyting to help you please let me know..I miss you and I hope you´ll be back soon♥♥
adorkable74
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:47 pm (UTC)
I know I'm one of your newer friends, but I can already tell you are a great person and friend:) Don't let the ones who defriend you get you down, it really is their loss. Your real true friends will stick by you no matter what! I don't understand why some people cannot understand RL comes first, and we can't always be here all the time. I hope things get better for you.
I am VERY happy to have you as a friend:)

*Hugs*
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:35 pm (UTC)
I am so glad and happy that I´ve gotten to know you too♥
You are amazing and I´m so glad for all your kind words.
Thank you for being here for me♥♥
Hugs and loves♥
ckll
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:54 pm (UTC)
You comment more than you should sweetie and some days i feel bad i don't have the time to comment in your entries.
So if people defriend is for various reasons.
Love you
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:38 pm (UTC)
Thank you my sweet..I know I don´t always comment on your entries, but I do my best to keep up with you darling.
♥I love you
,,,,and you birthday present is on its way^^
♥huggles
(no subject) - ckll - Nov. 4th, 2010 06:46 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pippii - Nov. 4th, 2010 06:58 pm (UTC) - Expand
maristelasoares
Nov. 4th, 2010 05:59 pm (UTC)
What? You're a great friend hun... you are soooo gentle, adorable and generous
If someone defriended you, they weren´t your 'friends', that´s for sure

HUGSTIGHT
;-)

pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:39 pm (UTC)
Aww darling, you are so sweet thank you.
I´m so happy that I have you here.♥♥♥
Hugs and loves♥
violetknights
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:01 pm (UTC)
Hugs you so hard - you have gone through so much and you have had to be so strong for yourself and your family. I truly think you are one of the most amazing people i know - on LJ and in RL. I lost my mum to a long battle with cancer last year and your positivity and thoughtfilness shone through always. I go for months at a time when I'm too down to comment and yet you're always there, being amazing and doing beautiful sparkly posts for everyone.

It will get better for you I'm sure, and your Mum has the most wonderful daughter in you. If you and your Mum want a break there is a holiday in England here for you whenever you want. I have a seven year old daughter so you could bring Sarah too if you want.

Hugs you again, you're amazing xxx
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:45 pm (UTC)
*cries good tears for a wonderful friend*
Thank you so much for your graceous offer, you are one amazing friend.
I hope my Mum will get better, she has known my Dad sinse she was 13, got engaged at 16 and married at 18, so that is 42 years.. she miss him so much without really showing it.....
Thank you sweetheart♥
(no subject) - violetknights - Nov. 4th, 2010 09:42 pm (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:49 pm (UTC)
Tak min søde ven---jeger så glad for at du er her, og at dette ikke bare ligner en måde at få omerksomhed på....jeg ved ikke hvorfor de ikke vil være ven mere, men lige i dag, blev det for meget..
Jeg er SÅ glad for at jeg har dig søde, jeg elsker din poster om Xander så meget;)
♥knuser og krammer♥
kajmere
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:26 pm (UTC)
some people are just ignorant sweetie. don't blame your self or take it personal that people defriend, because they obviously don't see the gem that is you and your kindness. and you know what. thats their loss.

and geez. someone defriended because you dont comment? is that what that is about?
so please bear with me if I miss a post once in a while….
because really... thats just crazy. not everyone can always post on every single entry on their flist every day! that would mean quitting jobs lol.

please don't change ok. ♥ x 1,000,000

<3

Edited at 2010-11-04 06:26 pm (UTC)
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 06:51 pm (UTC)
Ohh I love you and your awesome comment, thank you for being here for me♥
♥love and huggles♥
(Deleted comment)
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:12 pm (UTC)
Thank you sweetheart, I´m so happy taht I have you♥♥
Having friends like you, makes my life so much better
♥hugs and kisses♥
woman_of_
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:01 pm (UTC)
You are a wonderful friend, and have made the effort to step out of LJ and into our lives away from the internet. You also have more than enough problems in your own live as well, so don't worry if, for whatever reason you cannot comment ALL the time to EVERY post. People who defriend you because of that seem to be expecting too much as far as I'm concerned.

I sometimes post as much as three times in one day, and really cannot expect my friends list to comment to everything. I accept that, anyone who cannot I feel is being a little greedy.

*gentle hugs tight*
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:14 pm (UTC)
♥I love you so much darlin♥ Thank you for being in my life♥
Hugs and kisses♥♥
sheryden
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:05 pm (UTC)
I've been randomly defriended, too, so I wouldn't read too much into it. Trust me, you're definitely a great friend! *hugs*

If they don't keep you on their flists, it's their loss.

*hugs hugs hugs*

Edited at 2010-11-04 07:06 pm (UTC)
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:15 pm (UTC)
Hey sweetheart, thank you for being such an awesome friend.
♥huggles and loves♥♥
(Deleted comment)
pippii
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:18 pm (UTC)
♥love you so much you darling♥
I treasure you so much and I am so lucky that I have you here♥♥
Thank you so much for you lovely friendship♥
Hugs and kisses♥
(Deleted comment)
bflyw
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:21 pm (UTC)
Jeg vet jo selvfølgelig ikke årsaken til at noen har slettet deg - folk bruker jo så mange grunner til å slette. Personlig hadde jeg folk på min liste i flere år som jeg ikke lenger snakket med. Jeg har kun hatt en eneste opprydning på 5 år, og den hadde jeg for litt siden. Da slettet jeg ALLE jeg ikke lenger snakket med, men min årsak var jo at jeg syntes det var ubehagelig at folk jeg ikke lenger hadde kontakt med kunne lese mine f-lukede poster.

Ikke ta deg nær av det!

Du er en vidunderlig venn! Du gjør mye mer enn de fleste!

PST - jeg trenger adressen din!
Jeg innser at det snart er på tide å sende ut julekort! (Noe som betyr at jeg snart må begynne å lage dem!)
pippii
Nov. 5th, 2010 08:43 am (UTC)
Tusind tak min ven...ja der er mange grunde til det, men det er folk jeg taler med og sender gaver og kort til......
Jeg skal PM dig min adresse straks.
♥klemmer♥
pollyspn
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:37 pm (UTC)
Hey, once I told you I was a fucking foul-mouthed. Do you remember? Well, you know what I think you should say to such people so that demand that kind of thing?

GO TO FUCKING HELL...AND FUCK OFF YOU BASTARD SON OF BITCH SELFISH..

God!! God! I'm really pissed off with people who don't look around and don't see the next and only see their own navels and think the world turn around them ..

Fuck! You got your problems, we all have ... And friends were not supposed to be demanding, they should be gentle and understanding .. True friends demand nothing from us .. True friends just are there when we need them, and when they need us. The role of a friend is always support, not only in good times and festivities but especially in bad and hard times.

Baby, don't be discouraged by this fucking kind of people .. You're a better person than that, you're one super mega special ... You're fucking amazing people..

Don't feel guilty, don't feel embarrassed, let alone think that you are owe something to someone. You don't owe anything to anyone! You just need to answer to your conscience and your heart. If they are at peace, then do what I said: tell everyone to go to fucking hell!

I love you, never forget that, ok??

A big tight Brazilian hug for you!!!
pippii
Nov. 5th, 2010 08:44 am (UTC)
LOL yes you told me and I´m glad that you are♥♥♥
Thank you for all the kind words honey, and I love you too♥
Hugs and kisses
cmc1964
Nov. 4th, 2010 08:02 pm (UTC)
Hi sweetheart, you can`t be a bad friend, because, that is not in your nature! You are lovable, kind, open, generous and who not appreciate that, does not deserve to be your friend. Please take this not so much to your heart. Friendship has to come from both sides, not unilaterally. Do not be sad please hon, you've still got us.
I'm really sorry to hear that you aren`t doing so well, and you still in so much pain. I hope it will be better soon. Please do not give up!!! (cheer you up)
It`s good that you and your mum help and support each others. Thus, it`s perhaps a little easier for each of you. For you and your mum a very big hug and lots of positive thoughts.
Cuddle and kiss you!
pippii
Nov. 5th, 2010 08:54 am (UTC)
I am so happy that I have you here sweetheart, I treasure you so much♥
Mum and I support each other, as we have been through so much together, I´m so lucky that I have her.
♥hugs and kisses♥
buzziecat
Nov. 4th, 2010 08:24 pm (UTC)
You see my icon? Get rid of the downers. If the downers defriend you, don't worry about it.
I don't know why anyone would defriend you, pippii but please don't take it to heart.
Some people do a little cut to their flist and take off people with whom they don't communicate often so it isn't even personal sometimes.

Anyhow, I am sorry to see that you are upset and I feel very upset for your mom - losing her husband, partner, love and now her apartment. Is there nothing to be done about the apartment so she doesn't have yet another big change in her life? Is she entitled to your father's pension the way a spouse is often entitled here in the States?

As for grieving, it is something people have to go through. My mother went through a terrible time and finally began to recover and was able to enjoy life again. She never stopped missing my father but she came to peace with the loss. I hope your mom will get to that place also and it's so fortunate that she has you to help her.

However, who is helping you? You need support as well. If you are still seeing a therapist good. Perhaps your mom can see one for awhile to help her get through this difficult time. I hope so.

*big, comforting hugs to you and your mom*
You are in my thoughts.
xoxoxo
buzzie
pippii
Nov. 5th, 2010 09:06 am (UTC)
Thank you so much buzzie, for always being here for me♥

We have gotten all the money we can get for Mums apartment, but it is still to expencive for her.

As for Dads pensions..he got them out when he turned 62 and put them in my brothers house, when my parents thought they would live there till the end of their life. That means that there is not a penny for my Mum now.
She got a little money, but that was a one time amount, so she´ll need to be careful with them.

I know it´s grieving and it is good that she has started I was getting very worried about her. Problem is, that she is a diabetic, and if she doesn´t eat, that´ll be bad for her. We try to plan dinners together several times a week, that way I´m sure she eats....
As for help, Mum and I have each other that´s it....and I have you that looks after us. I´ve talked to Mum about getting some proffesional help, and her doctor can arrange is so she doesn´t have to pay much, so maybe she´ll do it...
♥thank you for being so awesome♥
Love you buzzie
(no subject) - buzziecat - Nov. 5th, 2010 10:01 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pippii - Nov. 6th, 2010 04:28 pm (UTC) - Expand
shanachie_quill
Nov. 4th, 2010 08:29 pm (UTC)
*hugs you* Don't worry hun. At least with me. I know things are rough and at least with me you're doing a fine job with being a friend.

*hugs you tightly*
pippii
Nov. 5th, 2010 08:49 am (UTC)
Thank you honey, that means a lot to me♥
Huggles♥♥
(no subject) - shanachie_quill - Nov. 5th, 2010 03:31 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pippii - Nov. 5th, 2010 03:54 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - shanachie_quill - Nov. 5th, 2010 06:49 pm (UTC) - Expand
asaneismrnuts
Nov. 4th, 2010 08:34 pm (UTC)
Hvem end det er der har fået dig til at føle dig utilstrækkeligt så skulle de skamme sig!

Du er vidunderlig Vennen-Min! Er SÅ glad for at have mødt dig og har fuld forståelse for at livet ude i den virkelige verden en gang imellem kan komme i vejen.

Hey lige et random spørgsmål... kan pludselig ikke huske om du har huller i ørerne... har du det?

Kæmpe kram
pippii
Nov. 5th, 2010 08:50 am (UTC)
Tak skal du have min søde.
Jeg er også så glad for at jeg har fundet dig♥
Ja, jeg har huller i ørerne, tre i hver;)
♥knuser♥
(no subject) - asaneismrnuts - Nov. 5th, 2010 09:02 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pippii - Nov. 6th, 2010 04:30 pm (UTC) - Expand
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